Monday, December 31, 2007

Happy New Year

Yes, I know it's still 12/31 but I plan on doing some geocaching with the kids and some knitting later before I get tipsy on the one glass of wine I'll drink during the Annual Clue-Nanza. It's our tradition to invite friends and family over to play "Clue" and drink cheap wine. Dave is always Colonel Mustard and I'm Miss Scarlett. Maybe this year will the year Miss Scarlett won't be the murderess. The drunken floozy. Miss Scarlett is the floozy, not me. But the wine will go to my head.

This year, I'm adding chicken and dumplings to offset the wine.

Next year I plan on continuing my diet, expand my knitting skills, learn to quilt, find more geocaches and generally not get arrested or be a suspect in a crime. Oh, try to be a better mommy and wife by exercising more patience.

May your New Year's Eve be safe and your New Year's Day be hangover free. Visit me often in 2008.

Sunday, December 30, 2007

Soap Really Tastes Gross.

Last week it was decoupage. This week it was soap making. I love scented things so I thought, "Hey, this would be neat to make my own signature scent." Little did I know my signature scent would be burnt plastic.

It started off innocently enough. I used a double broiler to melt some glycerin bars. Once it melted, I add some aloe and vitamin E oil. Then I took it off the burner to add the fragrance. Once I did that, it was ready to pour into the molds. Easy peasy as pie. Oh, but nooooo, not to Queen Klutz. As I positioned myself and the double boiler pot over the soap mold, I reached for my spatula. I didn't want to take my eyes off the mold and soap for a second.

And then a faint whiff of burning plastic reached my nose. It got stronger a half a second later when I spied my spatula smoldering on my new stovetop. In a two seconds, I went from master soapmaker to soap covered, lavender scented klutz clutching a smoking spatula.

Saturday, December 29, 2007

Geocaching Virgin no longer

Dave gave me a GPS handheld for Christmas. I wanted something active that the kids and I can do together. When I read about geocaching, I thought this was perfect.

Yesterday, we loaded up the coordinates for our first cache. I picked an easy one in Loganville about 10 miles away. And we found it after only 5 minutes of hunting. This was so fun and the kids had a blast too. I highly recommend it. We're off to an old cemetery today for another hunt.

Monday, December 24, 2007

Dracula meets the Dominatrix

I thought it would be cool to give my sister in law (who loves candles) something different. When Vickie Howell from the DIY network suggested knitting a cover for a candle with wire and beads. I thought--this could be the item.

Last time I knit with anything other than yarn. It looks like something out of Count Dracula's Brothel. I did everything the directions said including measuring out the length of wire.

Dave, in his quest to be more tactful, said, "It's kind of nautical looking." PUH-lease. Only if Elvira got drafted into the US Navy.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Blue Cheese Dip

Blue Cheese Dip
I stole this from a friend in my knitting group. Thanks, Susan, for bringing this to our get together.

1 package precooked bacon, heated per package directions
1 bar cream cheese, softened
1 container blue cheese
2 tsp minced onions
1 tsp garlic powder
dash worschestire sauce
salt/pepper to taste

Crumble up cooked bacon and mix well with remaining ingredients. Refrigerate if you have any left over.

No, I've not done this yet...

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Decoupage--the Devil's Medium

Ick, ick, ick.

$14.98: Wesley wanted a new poster/coloring page. Ray, the diabolical four year old, grabbed a beginner's decoupage set.

$42.99: The cost of replacement Levi's for me after I attempted to help Ray with our first decoupage project.

Seeing my husband's face when he realized I glued my fingers to the fireplace hearth: ANNOYING.

Why have I not learned that I do not possess the craft gene (except for knitting of course)? It's the vain hope that one day I might be able master the art of applying glue without bodily injury.

Why hasn't Hobby Lobby put a Wanted: Dead or Alive poster of me in their windows? They make too much money from me.

Why hasn't the federal government passed a law prohibiting decoupage? They've passed laws for everything else.

Have a Safe and Merry Christmas!

I won't be posting for several days due to Christmas and the baking I need to do. Unless of course, there's some knitting news that I can't wait to share b/c I'll pee in my pants if I don't.

I hope everyone has a blessed, safe and love-filled Christmas and New Year's!

Monday, December 17, 2007

Turn out the lights--the party's over...

We had our annual Christmas get-together at our house last night. We refuse to call it a party because party implies we need to clean the house.

We had Kelly Rosebud's brisket, Popeye's spinach salad, baked potatoes, corn on the cob and apple crisp cake for desert. Wines, sweet tea, beer and vodka completed the menu. It was one of the biggest spreads I personally have ever cooked. I hope everyone had as much fun as I did.

Today as I type this, I am popping Maalox. Brisket, several different kinds of wine, and apple crisp cake is not a mix I'd recommend. Aaaahhhh.

Barrow Holiday Connection is winding down. I've coordinated (and not without an increase in swearing and hair pulling) 700 or so family applications (about 1650 kids) within a 6 week period. I've matched families with private donors and gotten a holiday "store" ready thanks to the work of seven or so very dedicated volunteers.

Three more days and I can rest and enjoy my Maalox in peace.

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Knitter's Night Before Christmas

Stolen from Knitmom.

Knitter's Night Before Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas and all around me
There was unfinished knitting not under the tree,
The stockings weren't hung by the chimney with care
'Cause the heels and the toes had not a stitch there.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
But I had not finished the caps for their heads.
Dad was asleep---he was no help at all.
And the sweater for him was 6" too small.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I put down my needles to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash.
Tripped over my yarn and fell down in my stash.
The tangle of yarn that lay deep as the snow
Reminded me how far I still had to go.

When out on the lawn I heard such a noise,
I was sure it would wake up both Dad and the boys.
And although I was tired--my brain a bit thick,
I knew in a moment that it must be St Nick.

Yet what I heard left me very perplex-ed
For nothing I heard was what I expect-ed.
"Move Rowan! Move Patons! Move Koigu and Clover!
Move Shelridge! Move Starmore! Move Spinrite!
Move over!

Lopi, don't circle around, just stand there in line.
Pay attention you sheep and you'll work out just fine!
I know this is hard as it's just your first year
But I'd hate to go back to 8 tiny reindeer."

I peered over the sill. What I saw was amazing:
Eight wooly sheep on my lawn all a-grazing!
And then in a twinkle, I heard at the door
Santa's big boots stomping on the porch floor.

I rose from my knees and got back on my feet.
As I turned around, St Nick I did meet.
He was dressed all in wool from his heat to his toe
And his clothes were hand knit from above to below.

A bright Fair Isle sweater he wore on his back.
And his toys were all stuffed in an Aran knit sack.
His hat was a wonder of bobbles and lace
A beautiful frame for his rosey red face.

The scarf on his neck could have stretched for a mile,
And the socks peeking over his boots were Argyle.
On the back of his mitts was an intricate cable.
And suddenly on one I spotted a small label:

"S.C." in duplicate on the cuff.
So I asked, "Hey, Nick, did YOU knit all this stuff?"
He proudly replied, "Ho, ho, ho, yes I did.
I learned how to knit when I was just a kid."

He was chubby and plump, a well dressed old man,
And I laughed to myself, for I'd thought up a plan.
I flashed him a grin and jumped up in the air,
And the next thing he knew, he was tied to a chair.

He spoke not a word, but looked down in his lap
Where I had laid my needles and yarn for a cap.
He began then to knit, first one cap then 2--
For the first time I thought I might really get through.

He put heels in the stockings and toes in some socks,
While I sat back drinking a scotch on the rocks.
Quickly like magic his needles they flew,
Good Grief! He was finished by two!

He sprang for his sleigh when I let him go free,
And over his shoulder he looked back at me.
I heard him explain as he sailed past the moon,
"Next year, start your knitting sometime around JUNE!"

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Knit of Passion Winners

Since I had so many responses, I decided to have a "best answer" winner and another drawn from a hat. The Knitorious Mrs. B had the best response as voted by my knitting group.

Her answer:

Why do I knit? You might as well ask "why do you breath'? I'm driven to knit every day, every where, any where and any time I can! I think the motivation to knit continously is an internal mechanism hardwired in my brain that provides me with a sense of peace, power, pleasure, and fullment in the knowledge that I am creating, receiving and giving all at the same time. It is not merely hobby or craft to me. I view knitting as a philosophy with this core belief: Yarn plus needles equals productive tranquility! I would have knitted through my last PAP SMEAR if it were possible to work my cables without running the risk of dropping a stitch!

Thanks for asking!


I think I would also knit during my yearly exam also.

The other winner is a non-blogger, Malisa. Her answer was:

Reason 1: I knit to stay sane! I am a 6th grade school teacher and mother. My daughter is 12 and my son is 8. When I knit something beautiful I have a tangible item that will stay complete and can be used. As a teacher and a mother my other tasks are NEVER complete. There is always more laundry, homework, laundry, shopping, laundry, paperwork, sorting, laundry, planning, laundry, grading, laundry, grounding, soccer, laundry, concerts, doctor and dentist appointments and did I mention the freeking laundry! My knitting is always with me. As soon as I figure out a way to fold laundry and knit at the same time I will be sooo content!
Reason 2: I knit in memory of my dear friend, Kaye Peck. Kaye lost her battle with cancer on Oct. 25 this year. Kaye taught me to knit four years ago. She was an incredible music teacher at my school who made scarves for almost every new faculty member each year. I knit her a prayer shawl and she took it to every cancer treatment. Her husband gave me her stash and I intend to keep up the tradition. I miss my friend and I feel her with me when I knit.


Thank you to all who entered. I had so much fun reading your answers. I may do another contest early next year!

Friday, December 7, 2007

Felony KUI


A new law--Knitting Under the Influence. I started my second sock set. Okay say that three times fast while drink a glass of cheap wine from Wally World. But a word of advise, never knit a sock while drinking wine. It adds up to a misshapen wad of wool and a major headache. I actually handcuffed myself with my magic loop. The picture above is pre wine sock. I'm too ashamed to pose the post-wine sock.

Plaid, Plaid everywhere

I'm surrounded by plaid. Dave, God bless him, loves plaid. I don't mind it myself. I'd love to stare a good lookin' Scot with a plaid kilt. But good grief, Dave has taken plaid apparel to a whole new level. Red flannel plaid shirt with a blue plaid flannel pajama bottom. A green plaid coat. He looks like a demented elf! To make matters worse, he's passed the plaid gene on to Wesley who thinks it's perfectly fine to wear red plaid bottoms with yellow striped soccer shirt.

What brought this rant on against plaid? Zack's new collar for Christmas is plaid. ENOUGH!

Saturday, December 1, 2007

Hot Cocoa Swap!


Two of my favorite things--and I won't scare you with my Julie Andrews impersonation. Chocolate and yarn!!! Is this a perfect swap or what? Go here to get the rules to enter. Tell them I sent you!!