Oh but God has a warped sense of humor or the very least, has it in for me.
Walking into my bedroom last night, the strobe night light from Regan's room illuminated the floor for a second. I screamed like a Dracula victim when I spied a snake resting near my bed. After I pelted the reptile with shoes, I peeled myself off the closet door when the snake failed to move. I discovered Regan planted her plastic but live looking snake.
The next episode was getting into the shower only to find Regan had coated the shower floor with conditioner. Apparently she was practicing for the rubber dinosaur Olympic ski run and I should have been more careful (her words and Dave's unspoken thoughts) I don't know how I will explain the large bruise on my ankle or my posterior. However, I am open to suggestions.
The final straw was flopping on the bed and onto a miniature car show featuring Hot Wheels cars in various states of condition from the wheel-less to the new car that was purchased this past weekend. I am also open to suggestions for a good chiropractor.
I am now trying to invent a Turning a Deliquent into a Nice Child-inator.